A person without a friend is only half-way there
Recently, while having breakfast with some of my newfound acquaintances, I had a moment of profound self-discovery: I was not being myself while talking to them. Funny how humans can have such dissonance; to know that you are not yourself, and to know that you are putting on an act.
Walking to the central library, I realized how much I missed the bullshitting I had with Laopui and how I was entirely myself only with her around; that even though when I am alone, I am not acting, but only with her can my true self be liberated. It is perhaps like how Christians view God; like how they are only themselves not when they are alone but only when God brings out that spirit in them to which only God can access. Of course, God doesn't exist... just saying...
I guess that is really what I miss most about Laopui; memories of our times together matter, but perhaps not as much as the fact that the key to access certain parts of myself have forever been deposited in UK for the time-being.
Walking to the central library, I realized how much I missed the bullshitting I had with Laopui and how I was entirely myself only with her around; that even though when I am alone, I am not acting, but only with her can my true self be liberated. It is perhaps like how Christians view God; like how they are only themselves not when they are alone but only when God brings out that spirit in them to which only God can access. Of course, God doesn't exist... just saying...
I guess that is really what I miss most about Laopui; memories of our times together matter, but perhaps not as much as the fact that the key to access certain parts of myself have forever been deposited in UK for the time-being.
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